indecision

Friday, February 5, 2016

amassed above

dropped among lose ends
i traipsed within time
encompassed by its whole
slipping only when forced

i do but assume an escape,
as i write said word

elongated to my own existence, belief
whole honest truths

not able to realise. that within stems my future

to be seen
as me

alone

rife

Saturday, January 23, 2016

am i right?

feeling depth understood only from learning
i escape into the void that is mind
perhaps memory
despairingly hope

seeing the hanging to wit i cling
i let go
understanding that alone i am
me
simple
not inhabited completely by needs influenced.

selfish perhaps
desiring wholeheartedly to find ease

safe in the emptiness of being, i sit.
still holding to love, lust, longing and hope

weakness abides

is it trust in my beliefs or human touch that i lack?

i don't want to speak, i have delved deep without knowing why
following the past read
only feeling that it is right

for now
as i
can only project who i am at face value
as i am not strong enough to be completely free

yet

to be me
as i wish, without vice
aloft of desire and need

i must pine

my love has changed.

Friday, November 27, 2015

waiting to be

for that moment
that place
the escape that is enabled

shamelessly me
enshrined in a smile

because of it

the music
the loop
the levity that i hold dearly as it is where i find my joy

dancing
alone
within
masked by the beat
lucid to the eternal

because i can be lost
within myself among the noise
my own being that reaches for a happiness that drapes time

to forget for me is to hold close

time

moment

visions of the joy passed and the future that lay ahead

only alive will i feel this passion

awakening
forgiving

i shall always be

Friday, September 4, 2015

and so it shall be

am i but only wanting to be anew
being simply an imprisoned image of my limited vision
acting becoming
while only showing a small sense of self

a part
withheld within my own scope

not disappointed
afraid of the reach
or hopeful of a rise

but

journeying

awakening and discovering

Could what feels slowly be but just a matter of fact of time?

perhaps i am aloft
empty and void of needless hoping

as i dont need its will
its talon

as i am me


Friday, August 28, 2015

fall down into happiness

whoops there i go,
dropping myself into a hollow
letting my knees go weak, slipping beneath the clouds
leaving space for freedom to abound


when we open we unfurl
allowing an existence to seem near,
one that
perhaps

is not real.

i often wonder if i were to be strong enough to let go
to be what one knows they have learned
escaped of conformity
free to live with the unknown

afriad and enlightened

i wonder if i could be
and would i

Saturday, August 15, 2015

whole again

feeling strong emotions, unable to discern

from the pain of need, want, desire
to the longing for lust, greed and hope

awash with self i have been but unable to contain
my empty thoughts
my pain

self involved so deep within my mind
left to believe that i am mine

falsifying my own existence to pray for a stronger day
unable to see, to realise that the shame shows me the way

beyond minutes and hours, those periods that make me feel so weak
at he knees, lost again, helplessly
caught up with blinkers on

i should feel ashamed.

when i understand after time passed, i do but open up once more
forgiving others
forgiving hate
releasing myself

i can be in control but i digress

i smile
i feign

until i can be

Friday, April 3, 2015

i don't eat lamb

sitting aloft
gorging on but feed
fat with content

facts only false
life a wasted speck

in space and time most immeasurable
i sit silently

enjoying my mind, too much
traveling from past through future 
at each point trying to let go some more

to not want
desire
feel

tripping along the journey
happy and free

i am me

and?